Salam.
i woke up this morning feeling all gloomy inside. i looked at the clock and it said 4.30 am. i remembered that i slept whilst studying physics last night for today's test. since i haven't finished studying yet so i decided to run through some of my physics notes. after some time, i started to feel sleepy again. i looked at the clock and it said 5.15am. thinking to myself, it's still too early for me to take a bath. so then, i decided to perform my ablution and followed by 2 rakaahs of tahajjud prayer.
after tahajjud prayer, still on the prayer mat, my mind wandered around a bit. thinking about stuffs. well mostly about life. what exactly i wanna be when i grow up. is it really a dentist? or is it something else.
i've once said this to one of my classmates, "ain tak tahu nape ain amik dentist. padahal ain memang tak suka menghafal. i like stuffs like maths dan seangkatan dengannya)"
she replied, "habis tu? macam mana? sempat lagi nak tukar ni ain."
honestly, i was hoping for a different response, like, "lama lama datang lah tu minatnya."
but i was glad actually she said that to me (thank you, you-know-who-you-are). it made me re-think about my decision. i began to contemplate. imagining myself back to the starting point, back to the day when i was busy signing up my upu forms, choosing carefully, which course should i major in and which university should i apply to.
and then it hit me.
all the things that i was hoping to find. i found it at that exact moment.
i've been exposed to this career since i was little. well my dad's a medical officer so that's why. he often talked about how advantageous you are when you become a doctor. when one of your family members become sick, you can help to treat them, especially when that family member is not the person with a lot of money. altho he didn't say it out loud, i know that deep inside, he's hoping that one of his children will follow his footsteps. he talked about many other stuffs too. and to my surprise, i didn't feel annoyed at all. infact, i actually loved hearing all of his stories about being a doctor. all of his encounters with different type of patients and so much more. only by hearing his stories, i fell in love with this career instantly. altho at this stage right now i've diverged a bit from the supposed path (i'm not taking medicine, instead i'm taking dentistry) but still, i'm on the same road of becoming a doctor.
"hidup kita nak capai redha Allah dan keredhaan Allah terletak pada keredhaan ibu bapa."
and so, i've remembered why i chose this path in the first place.
